A couple of days ago, I posed the "what do you think of lipstick, what do you think of nails?" question. Your responses are as I expected.

This all came about because a woman on the plane had her cell phone out the SECOND we landed, and when she found out that her appointment was cancelled, she immediately booked a manicure.

Now, I've never had a manicure in my LIFE. I do tend to keep my nails trimmed, shaped, and clean. And when I play around with polish (I like to), I do it for me, and I realize that only women are going to be looking at it, typically. Can't really wear lipstick - cakes too quickly for me. Sometimes I'll put it on and then completely wipe it off. Leaves a bit of color but no residue. A male friend shared with me once that lipstick grosses him out. I suspected he was not the only one. You all confirm that.

Thank you for affirming that I understand the male mind.

hln

Posted by: hln at 08:52 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
Post contains 183 words, total size 1 kb.

This is a question for the men:

Do you look at a woman's fingernails? If so, then what impresses you? Is it:

A) Length, shape, recency of polish job?
B) Whether or not nails are polished?
C) Decorations on fingernails?
D) Cleanliness of nails, polished or unpolished - doesn't matter?
E) You don't look at fingernails.

Now I have a question about lipstick. Do you:
A) Like lipstick and think it enhances a woman's sensuality/sexuality?
B) Like lipstick, but it depends on the color on the woman?
C) Like lipstick, but wish it stayed on the woman?
D) Dislike lipstick because it's fake and messy?

I have sneaking suspicions I know the answer to these. But I need a sampling. Tell your friends to comment, gentlemen. I'll follow this post up in a couple of days with my "sneaking suspicions." And how/why this topic came about.

hln

Posted by: hln at 08:28 AM | Comments (13) | Add Comment
Post contains 155 words, total size 1 kb.

If you have bumps on your thyroid gland (many do - I have 11 or so of them), they're called thyroid NODULES, not thyroid NOGGLES. Yes, I know what I'm talking about. Go look that up on WebMD or something.

hln

Posted by: hln at 09:17 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
Post contains 51 words, total size 1 kb.

Ok - everyone can try this game. It'll add some spice to the mundane.
Rules: Let flowerbed go unweeded for an extended period of time. For example, 6 weeks. The game actually commences when your spouse pulls the "big weeds." (We had one threatening to eat a window)

Layer self with bug spray/lotion. Commence weeding.

Scoring:

• Give yourself 1 point for every weed you pull
• Subtract 5 points for every plant you pull (oops)
• Give yourself back ten (10) points for every plant you find your spouse has pulled (made some good points this way)
• Subtract 10 points for every bug bite you incur

Posted by: hln at 02:13 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 140 words, total size 1 kb.

By Harvey! In, uh, honor of all the time I spend riding through the rural, "sane," part of the state, go visit. Here are a couple:

10% of Illinois' economy is based on the production of various corn products. The other 90% consists of official "Just wait 'till next year!" logo Cubs merchandise.

People from Chicago like to brag about their "Chicago-style" pizza, but it's really just regular pizza sprinkled with bits of people who hired non-union labor.

During the Civil War, Illinois was bitterly divided between those who wanted black people to vote and those who wanted to restrict the franchise to white people and the dead.

Posted by: hln at 11:34 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 119 words, total size 1 kb.

In my personal hell, I'd be wearing Capri pants. I honestly don't know what the rage of these dumb things is all about. I can't imagine they look good on anyone; I know they don't look good on me.

It's the same deal with skirts that end mid calf. WHY? Skirts need to be at the ankles or above the knees. If they end mid calf, muscular legs look just plain fat. I suppose women with too-skinny legs might look good in such apparel, but, yeek, are they ugly.

I know, this is such an important topic. How dare I put it off until a late Thursday night because I can't sleep.

hln

Posted by: hln at 10:41 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 117 words, total size 1 kb.

Stewart Appears in Court in Breach Suit

From the picture, the Breach Suit is neither dark nor light gray, carrying with it a hint of "dammit, I'm 60, but I don't look it - my hair still funks out the same."

hln

Posted by: hln at 08:07 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 46 words, total size 1 kb.

I posted briefly in my tipsy airport blogging spree that Florida law protects Sea Turtle nests. I wasn't aware how much (via Ravenwood).

For six months out of the year, residents of Cocoa Beach (and other parts of Florida) are forced to stumble around in the dark once the sun goes down. That's because baby sea turtles are too stupid to find the ocean once they hatch, and often end up following man-made lights instead of the moon. Now, turtles hatchlings are only born for one month during the year, but never the less from May 1 to November 1 residents who dare to turn on the light after 9 PM face a $1000 fine.

Posted by: hln at 06:09 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
Post contains 147 words, total size 1 kb.

There's an iPod blog. Talk about specialization. On said iPod blog I found this, which is most funny.

iPodMyBaby.com

Scroll your child.

hln

Posted by: hln at 08:40 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 27 words, total size 1 kb.

Just a few thoughts from the Tampa airport as I wait to board my now-three-hours-late flight.

• The airport Chili's doesn't serve strong enough frozen drinks. Order twice as many. Shrug off the cost with an "I'm on vacation."
• Florida marks Sea Turtle nests on the beach and declares it illegal to tamper with said nests.
• One shouldn't sunburn her shoulders when having to carry both a heavy purse and a laptop.
• Never ever get involved with the Literary Guild online "customer service" (an oxymoron in its own right - more to come when I have easy use of a mouse)
• Two hours of people watching is the limit for entertainment on just two frozen margaritas.
• Florida teaches Missourians proper skill levels for zippy U-turns.
• A minivan is not a convertible. Somehow, a minivan is an "upgrade" for a convertible. I disagree, car rental agent.
• WiFi in the airport...way cool
• FreeCell - not so hard.

Posted by: hln at 07:22 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 165 words, total size 1 kb.

So I get this call last night - one of those where you KNOW it's a solicitor because the person isn't there immediately when you answer. I pause half a second, and I get this slow-but-lilting female voice...

May I speak to BRLEEEEan orl Heather Nuggle?

Posted by: hln at 07:14 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 75 words, total size 1 kb.

Brian thinks that Illinois is is on the brink of secession. Instapundit takes interest.

(Aaron - MO has a nice governor.)

hln

Posted by: hln at 07:02 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 32 words, total size 1 kb.

Ok, so a woman is offering to "Tattoo your logo" on her as an eBay auction. Check this out.

What do YOU think should go there?

hln

Posted by: hln at 03:14 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 39 words, total size 1 kb.

The Dutch word for legs is bekijken.

hln

Posted by: hln at 02:21 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 12 words, total size 1 kb.

So, I had on shorts yesterday after the ride, and I was checking out my reflection in the mirror. I'm a tad Rubenesque these days (though not obnoxiously so), and that coupled with age has given me a smidge of cellulite. I said:

"Eww, I have cellulite."

Brian said, "what's that?"

hln

Posted by: hln at 10:25 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 58 words, total size 1 kb.

I decided today that I have way too few female friends, so I'm holding auditions. No whiners, please.

hln

Posted by: hln at 08:17 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 21 words, total size 1 kb.

People Europeans (of all people!) are grousing because toddler bikinis are now available, er, they were.

OSLO (Reuters) - A Swedish bikini-style top for toddlers will be withdrawn from sale amid criticism from a Norwegian cabinet minister that bra-like clothing was inappropriate for small girls.

"It is remarkably daft to make bra-like bikinis for one-year-olds," Norwegian Minister of Children and Family Affairs Laila Daavoey was quoted as telling the Norwegian daily Verdens Gang Thursday.

"This is a terrible commercialization of childhood. Children are not women. Bikinis on small children are a way of linking children to sexuality. We must say 'No' to this," she said.

Posted by: hln at 08:02 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 133 words, total size 1 kb.

My company hired a couple of new coders.





hln

Posted by: hln at 01:42 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
Post contains 13 words, total size 1 kb.

Brian and I scored pretty close to each other on the Moral Matrix test (see his scores).

Here're mine.

hln

Posted by: hln at 09:01 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 26 words, total size 1 kb.

I know I haven't been writing, like, at all, but my hits are through the roof this last week. Not sure how, but one of the images on this blog is getting a lot of attention.

Lotsa dudes out there looking for leggy women, I suppose. Why now? Who knows.

hln

Posted by: hln at 08:11 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
Post contains 59 words, total size 1 kb.