I've heard about this, but the first place I saw it was over at Mike Courtney's. Here's my state list.


create your own visited states map or write about it on the open travel guide

As you can see, I'm not much for the coasts. My most recent new states were New Hampshire and Massachusetts. Before that, California. Arizona/New Mexico was a band bus trip in high school. Brian and I flew into New Jersey briefly on our honeymoon (to change planes).

hln

Posted by: hln at 09:01 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Advice from a commentor:

"some of the posts here are ignorant. a person won't get osteoporosis or rickets. it's been found that women who drink milk get osteoporosis much more than vegan women. beer is more nutritious than milk, though i won't recommend that for kids.
the milk in the vending machines could be replaced with juices. i think it's best if the soda is also removed.

cows won't explode if not milked. the only reason they're in danger from not being milked is because they're given hormones that make them produce more milk than they naturally would, and because their calves are taken away to be made into veal. stop the hormones and let them have their calves and everything would be OK."

Refers to this old post. Commenter: PETA thanks you.

hln

Posted by: hln at 11:41 AM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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I eat cannibal
Feed on animal
Your love is so edible to me
I eat cannibals

I eat cannibal
It's incredible
You bring out the animal in me
I eat cannibals

What can you do
You're in a stew
Hot hot cook it up
I'm never gonna stop
Fancy a bite
My appetite
Yum yum gee it's fun
Banging on a different drum

This obnoxious 80's moment brought to you by Toto Coelo and angelweave.

hln

Posted by: hln at 08:04 PM | Comments (10) | Add Comment
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"Don't go changing, to try and please me
You never let me down before
Don't imagine you're too familiar
And I don't see you anymore."

Billy Joel wisdom, yes, indeed.

Not in the year 2004, evidently.

NEW YORK (Reuters) - Love is not blind -- at least when it comes to facial plastic surgery.

Of people who are dating or married, 59 percent of women and 54 percent of men would like to change at least one feature on their partner's face, according to an American Academy of Facial Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery survey released on Monday.

It found that men were most likely to take suggestions about plastic surgery as an insult.

The Alexandria, Virginia, academy sponsored the telephone survey Dec. 2-5 of 1,000 adults across the United States, including 738 who were dating or married. It had a margin of error of plus or minus 3.2 percent.

Respondents said they would change their lover's hair (24 percent women, 17 percent men), wrinkles (9 percent women, 11 percent men), nose (11 percent women, 9 percent men), mouth (6 percent each), eyes (5 percent each) or ears (4 percent each).

Posted by: hln at 10:20 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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This quiz fits me pretty well.

I am Pacman. I am an aggressive sort of personality, out to get what I can, when I can. I prefer to avoid confrontation, but sometimes when it's called for, I can be a powerful character. I tend to be afflicted with munchies constantly. What Video Game Character Are You?

If it sounds the same, it's the homonym game.

This was my mother's thing when I was younger - homonyms, homophones. Probably why I can spell pretty well. There's there, their, and they're. And then cite, site, sight, etc.

Today's homonym had me snickering, though. It's a good one in light of the mad cow frenzy aflight within the nation.

Awful offal anyone?

hln

Posted by: hln at 10:07 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Brian has pointed out that I have forgotten my name.

It's lack of blogging, people. Too much work. What can I say? I miss it. I hope to return to a regular schedule soon.

Though Louise Noggle isn't nearly as nice as Heather Louise Noggle. I think of Louise Jefferson. I'll try to return to hln posthaste.

hln

Posted by: hln at 10:30 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Tuesday night. Brian and I are working back in the gym, which is completely overcrowded due to the fact it was January 13, 2004, and those resolutioners are still hard at it.

I'm a people watcher. I admit it. So when this chickadee strutted, er, walked by in her navel-baring black pantaloons that just happened to say "Juicy" in large white letters across the rump portion, I gave up the gawk.

Juicy!

Actually, I thought she was a bit on the skinny side. Can skinny be juicy? Is that possible? Is this advertising? Public relations? Non-subliminal messaging? Whom is she attempting to convince? Perhaps a reminder - affirmation when she clothes herself? I feel juicy, therefore I am?

So I make the obligatory snarky comment to the spouse, "Honey, I promise not to wear words across my ass." And I point. We all know pointing is rude.

In the locker room, Juicy's got said marked part parked in front of my locker. Yes, really, she does. Thanks, babe. I didn't really want to read your rear, but it was right there. Two syllables in front of my Master Lock. It brought to mind that old catchphrase for SizzleLean - "Move over bacon; now there's something meatier."

The real reason for a non-wordy ass? I'm afraid "Succulent" just might fit across mine. Or perhaps a whole sentence. Or, Hans might suggest a haiku.

hln

Posted by: hln at 10:59 PM | Comments (16) | Add Comment
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My spouse has foreseen the fashion trends, according to MSN. (Well, MSN didn't state it quite that explicitly).

Fedoras Last year it was the newsboy cap, this year it's the fedora. Not everyone can pull it off, but a men's-style fedora, especially paired with a sleek low ponytail, can be chic, polished, and warm all at the same time. Try one in a preppy tweed, like Kangol's Newmarket Trilby ($54).

Posted by: hln at 03:31 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Ryan sent me this today. He sits across from me at work, and he sent this via IM. Some of you might find that odd to be instant messaging the person across from you, but, really, it's not.

Okay. I'll have to pedal faster. I finished reading the Lion Attacks Bicyclist article, and I looked to the right on the web page. And that's when I saw THIS.

SAN DIEGO -- Two women have been jailed in San Diego in an alleged poisoning plot.

Authorities say the pair planned to use the poison ricin to kill the husband of one of the women to get insurance money. The husband is a Marine at Camp Pendleton.

Authorities say the two women -- both 21 -- are lovers. They allegedly used a recipe they got on the Internet to cook up a small amount of the poison out of castor beans. Authorities don't suspect any terrorism ties.

California state troopers say they found the ricin in a car the two women were riding in east of San Diego. They say the poison was in a bag.

The troopers say they also found a pistol, a handwritten ricin recipe and some castor beans. They say the women were wearing shoplifted clothing -- with the sales tags still attached.

Authorities say the two had also tried in the past to kill the husband.

Posted by: hln at 06:57 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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Hey, boys and girls! I'm gonna try out!

Or not.

Silliness aside, I think it's a great idea. Get more people to the gym. Now, if we can just get some of the silly macho-but-not-really-in-shape men to stop grunting and lifting with obscene amounts of momentum instead of muscle, perhaps they'll stay.

hln hln

Posted by: hln at 10:08 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Snarky spouse Brian J. gives you a peek into his work life with his post Thank Goodness Software "Engineers" Aren't Civil Engineers.

The permalink is broken, but it's a top post. Brian forgot to sell a piece of his soul to Blogger AGAIN this month.

About the Domestic Engineer thing - I can't fold t-shirts. Enough said.

hln

Posted by: hln at 10:02 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Okay, that's not funny if you've just been shot in the leg.

Please don't tell me that the lady's name is Lola.

God save the Village Green.

(Get better Ray).

hln

Posted by: hln at 09:17 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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