July 09, 2007

Raining Like The Dog

So, today the husband, the boy, and I ran some errands. The weather was thundery and rain flirtatious, and he parked quite a distance from the Target - really quite a ways out in the parking lot in front of the next store over. I made some silly comment about the distance and the imminent rain, and that was that.

After shopping and paying for purchases, we prepared to step outside into the possible weather. And that's when Brian said it. He said, "I bet it's going to rain like the dog."

THE dog. Not cats and dogs. Not puppies. THE dog. I thought that was pretty amusing, ominous sky and all. Just a spitting of raindrops about 30 seconds after the comment as we stepped into the crosswalk in front of the store. But then the dog decided to bare its teeth.

SNARL. Downpour. Soaked baby. Soaked laughing baby. Soaked parents. LONG, long walk. Big raining dog. Who knew?

So, the upshot of this is, I guess, that if your spouse warns you of impending dog rain, especially if it's THE dog, please listen and insist on closer parking. Soaking wet family is worth a few laughs and a blog post, but, ultimately, a dry family in a dry vehicle is the better alternative.

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That's a Launch

Brian's started a new themed blog, QAHATESYOU.com. No, you need not capitalize it, but it's very fitting to do so. hln

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All Animals Are Equal

But some are, of course, more equal than others.

BEIJING (AP) - Nearly 2,000 officials in central China's Hunan province have been caught breaking China's strict one-child policy, state media reported Sunday.
The rich can afford to pay fines imposed by the government, the article says later.

hln

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July 05, 2007

Word of the Day

Absquatulate: to flee; abscond.

The baby has absquatulated with the household spatula.

hln

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June 30, 2007

Noble Tristan, Stain'd

I wondered who wrote those notes on my office desk. Guess he got a bit overzealous. blog.jpg
hln

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June 28, 2007

Walking Before Teeth

Baby James is approaching his birthday - he'll be 1! This morning he was a baby, but around 4:00 p.m., he became a toddler. I'm not sure what triggered the "I don't need your finger to walk, mom" response, but he completely eschewed my help and navigated all throughout the house this afternoon several times. Not too many falls.

So, wow. He's been doing a BIT of walking on his own - mostly along furniture or very short distances, but today it was WALKING. It's more of a shuffle, I guess. He looks like an extra from Shaun of the Dead, and he supplies his own eerily similar sound effects.

But, as the title notes, no teeth for the urchin. It's become a point of drama in our household. James is a BIG baby - 9 lbs at birth and I'm guessing 26 or 27 pounds now. He's taller than the kitchen table (which he often forgets and tries to stand up under) and eats small buildings for his morning snack. But they have to be pureed first because the stinker has no teeth.

I've been thinking about putting together a tooth pool with the winner receiving...the baby? No, I will figure something out. But someone needs to predict when James will get teeth.

If you like cute babies, you can visit him at his site.

hln

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June 27, 2007

Outsourcing

I read about the guy outsourcing his own job on stlrecruiting.com.

I've had good and bad experiences managing outsourced people and projects. I seem to be in a business thinking kick lately, so here are my rules of when to think about outsourcing software development (with a bent on that outsourcing being offshore).

Pursue offshore development when:

  1. Project management/quality assurance can be 40% to 50% of the application (not 40% to 50% of the cost, but 40% to 50% of the total hours).
  2. Project management is allocated to working hours that offshore developers are working - at least 1/3 overlap. That means a lot of really early mornings or really late nights...or both.
  3. The project is VERY WELL DEFINED. The specifications need to be exact, right down to writing the error messages and every business rule. Offshore developers will not fill in missing blanks. And be sure you do your own database design.
  4. The project is a new project, not maintaining older code that is in good shape.
  5. Iterative development is OK - there's a lot of back and forth with offshore development - fix this, change this, etc.
  6. Project is in .NET or Java. Stick with the standards. Perhaps there are a bunch of proficient PHP and Ruby and what-have-you offshore scripting shops, but don't bank on it.
hln

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June 23, 2007

Addendum to Getting Things Done

Business 2.0 has an article about David Allen, the author of Getting Things Done. I perused this while I ate lunch today, and there are five overarching things mentioned that are summarized as Collect, Process, Organize, Review, and Do. I might've said "Doh" out loud. I have my own principles to add to this.

Never, ever neglect the little things. In my "Organize" phase of each work day, I put together a bunch of little things that would advance other efforts if they were done. These can be as simple as sending short e-mails to setting up a new user in a system - anything under or at 30 minutes is a small thing. These take higher priority than bigger things (which will come next) because I can do a boatload of them and make sure they don't get swept to the back burner. It's usually the little things that make or break someone's customer service view of you and, by extension, your company.

The ball never drops with you. DO NOT DROP THE BALL. If you're in the middle of a tennis match in your work, as I often am, make sure you do what is necessary to send that ball lobbing over the net. It can be as simple as a response e-mail telling the other party when you'll officially respond. But do not, ever, let something sit for more than a day without some communication unless you are on vacation or cannot reach the other party.

But sometimes you need to, on purpose, leave the ball in the air/on the other side of the court. What, Heather, I thought you just told me not to drop the ball? Well, if you leave it in the air, you didn't. When you had last communication, especially if it's documented like e-mail, you do have the option of re-hitting the same ball or firing a new one. If re-opening communication fits with your overall agenda, goals, and workload, sometimes you re-lob. But often you don't. If you have projects that jerk into hurry up and wait, sometimes it's better to smash the ball over the net and let it sit in your business partner's court. You do run the risk of the unexpected smash back at you months later (oh, those are fun, out of the blue, TENNIS BALL), but if you've got no time for start and stop clients, do your due diligence, and let that ball mold on the other side of the court.

What else - oh - Make sure your definition of quality is higher than the other party's. You really can't go wrong here except in frustration level when a business partner doesn't mind putting marketing material to fore that says "Best Companie's to Work For" or something equally offputting. If you can remind yourself that you're pleasing yourself and that by doing so your client(s) will be pleased, now you're on the money.

I know I meandered off of getting things done, but to me getting things done with all these qualifiers is how business should be done.

And I felt strongly enough to actually write about it.

hln

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May 06, 2007

Whew, They Make Those

Is this not the best idea?

Grill Soaker

Quick And Easy Cleanup
Drop your grill's grate in this tub, fill it with warm water and grease remover and watch a summer's worth of burned-on mess disappear with almost no work! Ideal for cleaning grills before you put them away for the season. Large size accommodates most grates.
It'll fit your round pizza pans, too. Go and soak!

hln

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April 04, 2007

An Exercise in Social Engineering

Hey, try this for some fun.

Have trouble talking to strangers? A little insecure around the opposite sex? Want to appear more confident and charasmatic?

Borrow a baby, head to the nearest grocery store, and practice these tactics.

  • Smile, pick up a product, and explain its color, size, and/or function to the child. Lift your eyebrows when you talk.
  • Everytime the child smiles, for whatever reason, lean down and nuzzle his or her nose.
  • While interacting with your child, make an aside comment to the people who pass you. For example, "Jimmy, you like this lady's bonnet, don't you?" Or, in baby's voice (a high-pitched kind of nasal version of your own), "That's my favorite brand of butter, too!"
  • If the child isn't smiling at a person you'd like to interact with, tickle his foot or underarm. Make baby talk noises. Blow raspberries. A child's smile is worth more than you know.
If you're still not achieving social success, pick another baby; ensure this baby has dimples and not colic.

These tactics often works with small animals, too, but those aren't often allowed in places where you can easily sneak a baby.

hln

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March 28, 2007

Where Will Residents Put Their Cat Litter?

San Francisco to ban plastic grocery bags

SAN FRANCISCO, California (Reuters) -- San Francisco's Board of Supervisors voted Tuesday to become the first U.S. city to ban plastic bags from large supermarkets to help promote recycling.

Under the legislation, beginning in six months large supermarkets and drugstores will not be allowed to offer plastic bags made from petroleum products.
hln

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March 17, 2007

Cat and Dog Food Recall

Dogs and Cats Dying of Kidney Failure

A major manufacturer of dog and cat food sold under Wal-Mart, Safeway, Kroger and other store brands recalled 60 million containers of wet pet food Friday after reports of kidney failure and deaths.

An unknown number of cats and dogs suffered kidney failure and about 10 died after eating the affected pet food, Menu Foods said in announcing the North American recall. Product testing has not revealed a link explaining the reported cases of illness and death, the company said.

"At this juncture, we're not 100 percent sure what's happened," said Paul Henderson, the company's president and chief executive officer. However, the recalled products were made using wheat gluten purchased from a new supplier, since dropped for another source, spokeswoman Sarah Tuite said. Wheat gluten is a source of protein.
Store brands of wet pet food appear to be the blame. I'll extend my lesson of buying quality brands to this instance, though I have to point out that the recent Con Agra debacle certainly breaks that law.

Just wanted everyone to be aware. This includes the Schuncks brand locally.

hln

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March 15, 2007

Chicken Puree

Back in the pregnancy days, I decided there was no way my baby was going to be fed jarred baby food. Idealistic, maybe, but that's the way it was going to be.

Brian and I go to many book fairs, and I picked up a couple of baby food books, but it wasn't until a woman from church recommended this book, Mommy Made and Daddy Too, that I knew I had the book that would make this a reality.

This book tells you month by month what to feed your baby (when to introduce what food), how to select produce, and how to prepare the food. It's not difficult and mainly features a cooking pan, a microwave, an oven, water, and some food that goes with the water and the cooking pan into either the microwave or the oven.

Oh, and then there's the blender.

So we made it through carrot puree, which turns the blender orange. And sweet potato puree - which also turns the blender orange. There's acorn squash puree. Apple puree (maybe you've seen it before; we adults call it applesauce). Pear puree. Plum puree.

But you haven't seen anything until you've seen CHICKEN PUREE.

In the 8th month of life, our helpful book recommends chicken puree. It's simple enough to fix - see the cooking aids I mention above. Microwave some chicken in water. Throw it in the blender with more water. Blend...chicken puree.

But, oh, chicken puree. It's non-spiced, and after it's been blended, the ONLY way you know it's chicken is by smell. It looks a lot like a plaster mixture. It doesn't look like food.

Open mouth, insert spoon. Crinkle nose. Try to do the baby equivalent of chewing (no teeth). The consistency of pure chicken puree really isn't for babies - funny, isn't it? YOU try to eat a plaster mixture. We have since learned that mixed with a vegetable puree - usually squash - it smells a lot like chicken noodle soup, and it's easier to gum. So on to the next adventure.

But, oh, and there's another aspect. Poof - my child's no longer a vegetarian. And that's when you realize - wow, he's really grown up. Some mothers will tell you it's that first haircut (no, he's had 3). For me, it was the chicken puree. See, gone with the chicken puree were the pear-scented diapers. All that pureed produce really doesn't smell that bad after the nutrients are long gone. But chicken - that's a whole other story.

hln

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March 14, 2007

Wherein Heather Provides Valuable Insight

Study: Quick Walks May Help Smokers Quit

It's not stated in the article, so I think I'd better add it. Smoking while doing these exercises will not increase your chances of quitting.

hln

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March 13, 2007

So, Who Needs a Plane

12356.jpg

hln

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March 11, 2007

The Ultimate Chocolate Chip Cookie Recipe

I know that sounds like a boast, but try it. Per batch...

2 1/4 cups of flour
1/2 teaspoon of salt
1 teaspoon of baking soda
2 eggs
2 sticks of butter (real)
1 tsp vanilla extract (real)
1 tsp almond extract (real)
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup brown sugar
Chocolate chips (semi-sweet or dark chocolate) - small package - can't remember size

Mix the flour, baking soda, and salt together in one bowl. In the second bowl, cream the softened butter, almond extract, vanilla extract, and the two types of sugar together. Add the eggs and beat with a mixer..

Add in the flour a bit at a time and beat with a mixer.

Bake at 375 degrees for 4 1/2 minutes. Rotate trays to different racks (top rack's cookies go on bottom and bottom rack's cookies go on top). Bake 4 1/2 more minutes.

This looks a lot like any other chocolate chip cookie recipe you've ever seen. The differences are in red. The almond extract really makes for a tasty cookie base. And the sugar is cut from 3/4 cup of both white and brown sugar, and I promise it tastes better.

hln

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March 09, 2007

Indecision

You know. I flirt with it - really, I do. I think to myself - self, you really could find 30 minutes to an hour a day to type - in my usual 100 wpm mode - something into this little MovableType box. Become a blogger again.

You could do that, Heather, you know.

But therein lies the trap. It's easy to write. I do peruse the web news occasionally, and there are about 8 blogs I have on RSS feeds that I try to keep on top of, but BLOGGING requires oh so much more than writing.

So maybe I could be just a writer. Or, in my case, a sort of stream-of-consciousness typist. But that seems so narcissississsissstic (too lazy to look up spelling). And I tell myself, self, who really wants to read about the travails of a 34-year-old mom, her 5 cats, and her rapscallion son and his antics? (If you want to hear about the husband, he'll help you out there). And that usually shuts me down every time.

I could write about how to do a successful data integration. But I typically don't geek out here, so who'd want to read that - even though it's more process than technical detail. And, really, is there anyone still reading now - I'm making my point.

So, I'm stopping in to say hi because my urchin should be waking any moment. And then there's the pile of dishes and the several loads of laundry to do (loud chores we suspend during naps). And then I have this marketing website to work on.

I may be back. I may not. I gave it a few good years on a run. And then I took a couple off. And maybe more.

hln

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November 04, 2006

Whoops!

So CommonSenseMissouri.org just called to wake up the baby. Because that's all the stupid election recorded calls do is wake the baby.

So I looked them up to boo and hiss. And I found this little nugget. Hey, people at CommonSenseMissouri, we have this little company called Jeracor that does web work (development, QA, editing). We would have caught this little bit that Missouri is not Ohio. Just saying - I know they're both funky-shaped little states and all residing in the Midwest...

Common Sense!

hln

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November 01, 2006

Come On Down

The baby eats at 11. The Price is Right comes on CBS at 11, so I've been tuning in for a few weeks here for the first half or so. It's the same as I remember it from my childhood, and that gives me a nice feeling - all that 70s glitz, and the only difference in Bob Barker is that he's got white hair and has a beating of Happy Gilmore under his belt.

So I read yesterday that he's retiring. That he's 83 years old (wow). That's just crazy - working until you're 83. On the other hand, can you name any other shows that have barely changed since the early 1970s? It was a nice feeling, briefly, watching the PiR on the big screen and knowing that the biggest change was the prices. The prize women are probably thinner, too. Have to look that up.

hln

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October 23, 2006

The Joel Quotient

The name Joel means "God is willing." I looked this up because I know only four males named Joel, and three of them serve in a ministry capacity in my church. Three! There are not that many positions in the church, so I found that to be a large cluster of Joels.

If you know Joels, are they Christian? Just curious. I only know of one other, and we were 8 years old at the time, so I really don't have a way to follow up.

hln

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